Twilight

Hello again intrepid blog readers.

I have always had a fondness for vampire films. Interview with a vampire, vampire in Brooklyn, Queen of the damned, all of these and more have kept me entertained on those rainy days when pseudo intellectualism isn’t enough.

So when I saw twilight storming its way into the box office I couldn’t resist. I had even been encouraged by a whole host of good reviews.

How disappointing.

The film starts with the leading lady entering a new school (the college drama style should have forewarned me) and before too long is entranced by the strange mysterious family which also attend, especially their single son with unnaturally thin eyebrows.

Luck for her they are coincidentally lab partners! However he gives her the cold shoulder. After disappearing for a few days he then instantly takes a shine to her and this is where the film does nothing but go down hill.

The male protagonist is nothing more than a broken record for the next forty minutes repeating nothing but variants on “I’m dangerous you don’t want to get involved.” but fails to conceal his secret when he saves her by moving at inhuman speed, denting the car which would have hit her. How ever did she figure it out?

Then comes generous helpings of the stock teen romance culminating in the most disappointing scene of the film. He goes to show her how he transforms in the light. Cue dramatic music. He sparkles. The scary vamp has sparkly skin.

I’d go on but it’s time for bed.

Perhaps I’ll watch it once more to put myself to sleep.

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